Meow Meow Meow

Oink! Oink, woof. Meow, meow, meow. Baaaaaaa, mooo, moo, moooooooooooo, cock-a-doodle-doo. We should be friends, ok?

Fujiya & Miyagi - Ankle Injuries

Well, shit me draws' and call me Steven.

I wanted to post something that makes me want to blow shit up. This track gets the job done and then some.

Pro tip: Try to keep the explosive devices away from our faces this weekend, alright kiddies? After all, only you can prevent face fires. Have a good one.

Birdy Nam Nam - The Parachute Ending

Granny kazoo, let's have a tune

I feel strangely hypnotized. Don't forget to pour juice on your chin, as you ride of into the sunset on your wooden rocking horse. No worries, cheek chillers are on the house folks.

The Avalanches - Frontier Psychiatrist

Lickity Splits

Thought we'd try out a little video action today. Pay no attention to the widget, just play the freakin video. Bee-bop-a-lula.

Sweet Baby Jesus

This track elicits memories of popcorn balls and caramel apples. What I wouldn't do to snap into a few of them right now. I will tell you what I would do though, ride a curly tailed dragon down to the quickie mart wearing nothing but a smile. Until tomorrow gang.

Ray LaMontagne and the Pariah Dogs - Beg Steal or Borrow

Grease the Skids

Nothing like a little banjo to get the week started off right. It's like I injected myself with 100cc of pure caffeinated bacon bits...if that's even possible. Now eat up your cornflakes before they get soggy.

Trampled by Turtles - Wait So Long

Twizzlers and rootbeer floats

I can see myself easing into a barcalounger with this sick tune floating through the airwaves, punching me straight in the eardrum. Kick-ass chocolate sauce.

Then Envy Corps - Rhinemaidens

Shazzy Mctastic

This is a real knee jerkin', kickass, country type folk tune that really gets my mule a groovin'. Thought y'all should know. Keep it snazzy my children.

Old Crow Medicine Show - Wagon Wheel

Brown chicken brown cow

I feel like driving down a country road with the top down and a pitcher of pink lemonade when I tear into this track. Now all I need is a convertible and a pitcher.

The Rural Alberta Advantage - In the Summertime

Skid marks in my underwears

This song makes me want to put playing cards in my bike spokes and rip around my neighborhood like I'm some kinda badass.

The Joy Formidable - Whirring

HOLY BALLS!

I love this freakin track, and I just discovered it on Sunday. It reminds me of clowning around with my brothers as a young piglet throwing dirt bombs at each other and pissing in the yard. Good times until somebody gets dirt in their eye. The joys of growing up in the country.

The Mountain Goats - Palmcorder Yajna

Instant Gratification

This is what it's all about folks, killer beats and snazzy lyrics. If you don't find yourself at least tapping your foot, get that shit checked out. That is all for now. Rock on with your smock on.

Mike Doughty - (You Should Be) Doubly (Gratified)

A healthy serving of Justin Vernon for your ear hole

This track makes me want to put on a smoking jacket and a top hat, so I can waltz around a swanky hotel lobby with two drinks in hand. I'd also be enjoying a freshly opened minty toothpick.

If you haven't figured it out already, grooveshark made a fancy little widget for me to put on my site. How sweet is that!! This way it will be in the same spot every time, right where it says "Tasty Lick of the Day". AWESOME!!!!!

Carry on children.

Yahoo buckaroo

Well kiddies, I've decided to go in a new direction with Toe Jam Sam, etc. Why you ask??? Well buckle up my friends because I'm about to tell you...in list form.

1. There are only so many ways to kill a whale.
2. I kinda like whales, even ones that are poorly drawn in paint.
3. Nobody really looked at this crap anyway.

Now to determine a new direction. Here is another list of the ideas I've had in the past 5 minutes:

1. Funny things to do with your boogers.
2. Techniques for proper ear hygiene.
3. Kick ass music that I like.

Unfortunately for those with excessive nasal mucus and ear wax build-up, I will be going with the latter. Here is how it's gonna work out. I will post a song a day, and you will like it. If not, tough noogies. Come back the next day. I am planning on using grooveshark as my weapon of choice. What is a grooveshark you say? Some type of snazzy sea creature? Well not so much. It's only the most awesome thing ever!!!!! I have provided a link here for your convenience:

LOOK OUT! IT'S A FREAKIN' GROOVESHARK!!!!!!

Now that I've laid the groundwork, I need to get crackin on my first track of the day. Over and out.

Regards,

Gravy Boat Sampson

Astronaut whale....

...is a fuckin' dead whale. His career guidance counselor ought to be reprimanded.

Tight fuckin sideburns Mr. Whale

This is one kick ass party guys. There's only one problem..who brought that stanky ass Crab Cake Johnson to the club? Clean that shit up son.

Hey kids

Look at this picture, it's not like you have anything better to do.

The little engine that could.....

...run your stupid ass over. Every body knows, whales should never play on the tracks. Their asses are just waaaaaay too fat.

Rook rike we havin whare soup tonight fehras.

Pro tip: Never play on the tracks with a full stomach, or you might end up in somebody's soup.

Whales are so fuckin dumb...

Don't you know that's a big bucket of shit? For pete's sake, don't eat on that...dumbass whale.

Holy Toledo Sandwiches

It's a....it's a THING!?!?!?! whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.


Baby beluga in the deep blue sea....gets eaten by a big fuckin' tarantula